TO SERVE MAN: THE REVOLUTION
by SuperBear
Summary: Have you ever watched the classic episode "To Serve Man" and wished the people would rise up against the human-eating Kanamits? This story features such an uprising. Its leader is Michael Chambers, aided by Charles Xavier. Their army consists of Zoners, "Twilight Zone" characters who have been given powers that fit who they are.


"Let's go!" Michael Chambers shouted, waving his arm.

You know how you have one of those positive thoughts just before everything goes wrong?

Michael had such a thought as he led his army forward.

Things are going overwhelmingly well for us. Things are overwhelmingly in our favor. The Kanamits don't stand a chance.

Shortly thereafter, things went sour for "General" Chambers and his army.

It was a strange sight: the former decoding specialist from Kentucky with his sleeves rolled up and a loose red tie around his neck. (The casual wear made him less of a target for Kanamit snipers. And honestly, Michael didn't like uniforms.) As "Mr. Loose-Tie," he was surrounded by men in green Army fatigues.

Except, of course, for the hairy fellow in the sleeveless undershirt, the one with the long claws extending from his knuckles.

The one who now spoke to Lieutenant Stockwell.

"Hey, bub, you all right?"

Stockwell just stood there in a daze.

"What do you think, Logan?" Michael asked, holstering his shiny silver weapon.

"I think his mind just went bye-bye," Logan said.

Michael looked around at his platoon. Most of the men seemed fine. No one was shouting about creatures who weren't there. Or about masks that had changed their faces.

A moment later, Stockwell blinked his eyes.

"I'm back," he whispered.

"Where were you?" Michael asked.

For a moment, the lieutenant looked confused. Then: "I was in a cave with the Kanamits. In fact, I was one of them." He blinked away tears. "General, I don't think I can hurt them."

"Great, just great," Logan said derisively.

"Easy, Logan." Before Michael could say more, another soldier stepped forward. The man's haircut reminded Michael of Moe of the Three Stooges. Unlike Moe, the soldier had sharp eyebrows that gave him a grim other-worldly appearance.

"Excuse me," the soldier said in a quiet yet gravelly voice. "Could you tell me what planet this is?"

As Logan quietly grunted in exasperation, Michael gave the soldier an inquiring look.

"Where exactly do you think you are? More importantly, what is your situation?"

The soldier lifted an eyebrow. "I am Spock. From the planet Vulcan." As he held up one hand in a "V" pattern, he frowned. "Do you know how I came to be here?"

Cursing inwardly, Michael gestured to Stockwell and the soldier. "You two stay here." Once again waving his hand, he barked orders to the rest of the platoon. At least as much as anyone with a casual easygoing voice can bark orders.

"Anyone who is not under the mental influence of the Kanamits, move out."

"If you're seeing creatures no one else can see, you're under their influence," Logan said. "We meet up with the Men In Black Division at the south end of the main processing plant."

While the soldiers marched, Michael walked swiftly ahead of them. As he did, Xavier addressed him inside his mind.

"Hello, Michael."

"Hello, Charles," Michael said mentally. "You know, if not for your mental shields, the Kanamits would have Logan thinking he's a mannequin on vacation by now."

"I realize that."

"As it is, Logan's claws aren't going to do much good against the mental tricks of the Kanamits."

"I understand your doubts and fears, Michael." Even as a mental voice, Xavier spoke in a warm tone. "But as a leader, you must project confidence."

"I know. No signs of uncertainty. No being ill at ease. Don't want to demoralize the troops. Logan told me."

"He's right, you know."

Outside Michael's mind, Logan shouted to the group. "We've got this, guys. Look at all we've got on our side. Charlie's mental shields, people with powers. The Kanamits don't stand a chance. One final battle, and we go home."

Michael continued his inner dialogue. "You know, Charles, I'm a little worried about overconfidence."

"That is a sensible position. A little fear can compel one to make more effort."

"Still, it might help if I had some of Logan's optimism. Or Henry's. Or yours."

"Use the mental exercise I taught you."

Nodding absently, Michael thought back to the key events that had brought him to this point.

Consequently, this meant he thought about the existence of God and the Zoners.

There was a thread that connected them.

He thought back to when he was on a train, and he met a very interesting young man, This young man knew the Bible very well but also knew comic books and pulp science fiction.

He leaned in as he talked excitedly.

"It's true. There's great evil in the world."

"There was," Michael said. "Before the Kanamits."

"They may be trouble," the young man said. "But God is always working out threads of good, a plan."

As the young man used his hands to gesture a needle pulling thread, Michael simply smiled.

"I've never had strong feelings about God one way or the other. At one point, that may have made me an oddity. But now with the Kanamits here to cure disease and grow food in barren lands, I suspect the God topic has become irrelevant for a lot of people."

The young man was undeterred. "Watch for those threads," he said.

In his mind, Michael sat back as he took a drag on a cigarette. In a sense, for the people of Earth, the Kanamits had become their gods. Here to solve all their problems and bring them bliss, happiness and joy everlasting. To turn them all into children.

That should have been their first warning. Some Earth leaders had promised Utopia and brought disaster and misery instead.

"The Kanamits may be our downfall," Michael said quietly to the young man.

"Look for those threads, Mister Chambers. You'll see them," the young man said as he slowly faded away.

Michael imagined things that had never happened on the train.

"Next stop, Willoughby!" the conductor shouted.

And Billy was there.

He pointed to a tall bald Kanamit, all nine feet of him, and shouted, "You're a bad man! You're a very bad man!"

The Kanamit simply smiled. Just like the Kanamit smiled when he weighed people for Space Flight 914.

Michael moved ahead in his mind to when he boarded that flight.

There was Patty running toward him.

At first, he smiled, thinking she was there to see him off. They had, after all, worked together on translating a Kanamit book. Despite the very difficult language, Patty managed to get the title. "To Serve Man."

When Michael climbed down the stairs of the ship to greet Patty, little did he knew it was to be the last bit of normal in his life for quite some time.

Though held back by a Kanamit guard, Patty shouted to him.

"Don't get on that ship! 'To Serve Man!' It's a cookbook!"

Michael tried to flee but a Kanamit pushed him on board and closed the stairs behind him.

He spent a lot of time alone in his room. At one point, Kanamit Prime brought him a tray of food. Michael called him "Kanamit Prime" because he was the one who first addressed the people of Earth. Also because the Kanamits didn't have cute names like "John" or "Diana."

Once alone with his food, Michael ground part of it into a pile of particles He continued doing this with his other trays of food. Until the ship landed.

Over the ship's sound system, he heard they had landed on the Kanamit homeworld. The announcer talked about it in a chummy tone, like it was some kind of tourist destination. Still trying to fool the others on the ship.

In any case, when next his Kanamit friend visited, Michael threw the particles in his eyes. Then he ran.

Honestly, he didn't expect to get very far. But what could it hurt to try?

What was he supposed to do? Just lie down and be dinner?

But then certain things happened in his favor, things that helped him.

Someone talked on the ship's sound system. It wasn't the mechanical voice used by a Kanamit.

It was a voice that was somehow both gruff and casual. .

"All right. Listen up, everyone. This is not paradise. The Kanamits want to eat you. You hear that? Eat you. Are you afraid? Good. Use that fear to get to the exit. You'll find people to guide you."

Even as the man spoke, Michael slugged two Kanamit guards, who simply reeled back and looked dazed. Not surprising, Michael thought as he ran. They probably weren't used to dinner that fought back.

Next thing he knew, Michael woke up in a room with a bare light bulb hanging by a string.

Thinking back, Michael realized that Charles must have used his mental powers to take temporary control of him. Normally, Charles didn't like to do that without permission. But there were exceptions to any rule. Helping someone escape the Kanamits would seem to be such an exception.

The man moved forward in his wheelchair so he was less of a shadow, more shiny flesh. Especially the bald head.

"How do you do? I'm Charles Xavier."

A stunned and dazed Michael simply offered an open-mouthed nod and a limp handshake. Xavier used his free hand to gesture to the man on his left.

"This is my associate Logan."

The man in the sleeveless T-shirt barely offered a nod.. "We have all the people off the ship. They're safe, Professor."

Michael noted this "Logan" had a hairstyle that involved two points. For Michael, it brought to mind a wolf or a wolverine.

"Our army's growing every day, it seems," Xavier said with a slight smile.

Now Michael noted window and other figures in the next room.

"A boy. A soda jerk. And a doll." Michael shook his head. "Not much of an army."

A slight scowl from Logan. "They may not look like much, but they've got it where it counts. By the way, your friend Patty is safe."

"Thank you," Michael said, though he blinked in confusion. "Um, that's good to know." .

"Yes, Patty is safe back on Earth," Xavier said in a soothing tone. "Our associates there were able to rescue her. As for our army here, there is more to them than you see, Mister Chambers. As there is to our situation." He held a finger to his forehead. "With your permission, I should like to show you mental images so you may better understand."

Making a face, Michael shrugged. "Seems to me like you've already been inside my mind. So why not have another go? Proceed."

Once Xavier closed his eyes, Michael's head shot back. He saw and understood. It was like watching a film with some kind of subliminal narrator explaining it all.

This room was part of a series of tunnels, a deserted underground Kanamit military base. It was now home to anti-Kanamit rebels. Here, the rebels hid, survived, trained. Sometimes they lived on food and clothing they shared from luggage they took. (Obviously, the Kanamits had no use for the luggage.) Such niceties as cigarettes and cigars came from those who had quit the habit. Or perished.

But other times, the things they needed came from another source.

"That is enough for now." Xavier's voice cut into the images, causing Michael to snap back to reality, such as it was. "You can learn other details later. We don't wish for you to become overwhelmed."

"That's very kind of you." Michael had always been known for a tone of mild tactful sarcasm. "But may I ask exactly where I fit into this?"

Folding his hands in his lap, Xavier smiled. "As you will learn, Mister Chambers, you are uniquely qualified to help lead our army. You are, in fact, vital to all this, believe it or not."

"I don't believe it. But if we're going to work together, I suggest you call me 'Michael.'"

"Is Mikey okay?" Logan asked.

"Not really."

"We can decide all that later," Xavier said. "For now you should rest, Michael."

"Yes, sleep tight, Mikey."

He did. Michael slept long and well. Not at all like when he was on the Kanamit ship. It's hard to rest easy when you could wake up on someone's dinner table.

When he awoke, he discovered the tunnel base had clocks, each one labeled "New York City Time, Earth." Michael's room had a cat clock with the tails and eyes going back and forth. After a change of clothes, he found his way to the room with the bare light bulb. To himself, he made a joke. Who is their decorator? As he sat on the edge of a wooden desk, he played with the pack of cigarettes he found there.

A man entered the room. He wore bottle-cap glasses, and his large eyes darted back and forth. Holding up a large red volume, he mumbled quietly as he read. He also held up a finger and nodded as if lecturing to an imaginary audience.

"And who might you be?" Michael asked.

The man offered a twitching grin without even looking up. Michael thought how he had the kind of smile one might see in a mental institution.

"He would be Henry Bemis." Xavier rolled forward in his wheelchair with Logan walking behind him. "And there's no sense talking to him. He's deeply engrossed in his reading, as you can see."

Michael wondered how the professor could be so ever-cheery, especially when the situation was so grim.

"He's in the zone, you might say." When Michael looked puzzled, Logan shot him a quick glance. "Don't worry. You'll get that later."

"Another fine member of your army, I see." Finding a lighter, Michael fired up a cigarette.

"Don't underestimate him, bub," Logan said.

"Mister Bemis is our finest strategeist." Still with the cheery voice and gentle grin, Xavier formed his fingers into a kind of temple. "He doesn't just read or absorb information. He makes connections, puts threads together. For that reason, he is our top analyst."

Michael glanced at the window into another room as he quietly exhaled.

"I'm all for rising up against the Kanamits. But your army, as I've said, doesn't look very impressive."

As Xavier offered a wry grin, Michael noted the hole in his chin.

"As you will see shortly, they are far more capable than they look." Xavier rolled over to a table and held up a glowing green rock. Next to him, Logan's face glowed green and yellow as he lit up a cigar.

"We've found a way to take a person and give him powers unique to who he is."

"Or she is," Logan said.

"We use meteor rocks from a town called Smallville."

Still holding his book up, a wild-eyed Henry spoke in a great burst. "Oh, yes! Jonathan and Martha Kent. Very nice couple. Found a spaceship. With rocks! And a baby!"

Michael made a face. "What's this about a baby?"

"A story for another time," Logan said.

"Quite so," Xavier said with a smile. "You'll have to excuse our Mister Bemis. Every once in a while he has a kind of outburst. It's a way for him to take a break from his reading."

Logan held his cigar off to the side. "If he didn't, his head would explode. Literally."

"Are you joking?"

Logan shot Michael a look. "Do I look like the kind of guy who makes jokes, bub?"

Grabbing a new book from a shelf, Henry tucked it under his arm. Then he held up two curled fists. "You've got to fight these guys. Fight 'em!"

"Don't worry, Henry, we will," Logan said casually and took a puff.

Henry turned to a map on the wall. The map was marked with "X's" and "O's" and he began tracing routes with his finger. The map stood nest to a picture of a Kanamit with red circles around his smiling face and green darts scattered throughout.

"The meteor rocks have enhanced Henry's abilites," Xavier said. "But not without consequence."

"You mean like the exploding head," Michael said. "If that's the case, don't sign me up for meteor rock treatment."

Before Xavier could respond, a woman entered. With blond curly hair and red lips, she looked like Betty Grable. Her nurse's uniform was smudged and gray.

"Professor, we're ready to began the next round of treatments."

Xavier nodded. "Make it so."

Michael tapped his cigarette. "And how did you two happen to be here to start this revolution of yours?"

More of that wry grin. "Logan and I were traveling back in time to solve a problem on our world. Somehow we ended up on your Earth."

Michael made a face. "Time travel? Other worlds? That's science fiction. It's preposterous."

"Said the man taken prisoner by aliens," Logan said.

"Point, my hairy friend."

"It's been a fun time on your world," Logan said drily. "We hooked up with a bunch of people suspicious of the Kanamits from the start."

"Yes, it was fortunate we did," Xavier said. "They have solved certain problems for us. But you can learn more about that later." He moved toward a film projector. "For now, let me show you what our army is capable of."

As the film ran with a clackety rattling noise, Michael watched the footage as it was projected next to the Kanamit dart board. The first thing he saw was a white-haired man with three arms, all of them very busy. Mr. Three-Arms was flicking cigarette butts and throwing playing cards. Next to him, a three-eyed man used an ice cream scoop like a catapault. Except those weren't rocks he was hurling. They were blobs of ice cream.

Michael couldn't contain his snort of derision. "You gave someone three arms so he could throw around harmless objects?"

"He already had the three arms," Logan said with a kind of calm gruffness.

"Yes," Xavier said. "These two are the last of the Venusians and Martians that secretly colonized your world."

With a slight smirk, Michael took another drag. "Are the Kanamits supposed to be frightened of someone with three arms? O r three eyes?"

"Just keep watching, Mikey," Logan said.

"Yes, watch. Michael," Xavier said quietly.

Michael turned back to the film. At first it was just Three-Arms and Three-Eyes. Then the picture jerked. Items exploded around a squad of Kanamits, and they went down, screaming and clutching their oversized bald heads. With eyes rolling up, many plopped to their knees then fell face down.

"You see, Michael, our friends can take ordinary objects and turn them into weapons that explode and cause the Kanamits to become unconscious."

"It not only makes for less enemy soldiers, it means a burden to the enemy," Logan said.

Michael went with the thread. "Taking care of all the unconscious Kanamits."

Now the film featured Logan flying through the air, long claws extended from his knuckles. And he was roaring as he slashed several Kanamits who staggered back but then quickly stood up straight. Just before an explosion knocked them out.

"You gave Mister Logan claws?" Though there was much to be incredulous about, it was the first time Michael actually sounded incredulous.

"He already had those," Xavier said with a slight chuckle in his voice.

"A gift from some scientists who kidnapped me."

"At least they weren't aliens trying to eat you."

"Got me there."

Xavier rolled backwards. "Our Mister Logan is able to heal quite rapidly. Unfortunately, the Kanamits possess the same ability to an even greater degree."

"Do they have any weaknesses?" Michael asked.

"Yeah, their minds," Logan said.

"As you are about to see, Michael." Xavier grinned as he pointed to the screen. .

With the last of his cigar, Logan gestured to the film. "Wait 'til you see what Billy can do."

On the screen, a boy appeared. He was like Dennis the Menace, Michael thought. Blond hair, freckles, blue overalls, red and white striped shirt. When the boy gritted his teeth, Michael saw a gap in the front teeth.

As he pointed up, the boy shouted.

"You're bad men! You're very bad men!"

The camera jerked again, and the cigarette fell from Michael's open mouth. As he extinguished it with a stapler, Michael knew Logan was smirking.

On the screen, four Kanamits had become giant jack-in-the-boxes, their bald bulbous heads swinging back and forth on giant springs. They even had cheeks painted red and pointy blue hats.

"Incredible," Michael said. "The boy can alter matter?"

"Not quite," Xavier said. "Billy is able to create mental illusions. And he causes others to see them, too."

"Even later on film?"

Xavier grinned. "Not actually. I'm showing this to you in your mind so you'll understand. It's very fortunate we have someone like Billy.. Logan and I can only do temporary damage to the Kanamits. Billy can make them mentally shut down, as it were."

"Three-Arms and Three-Eyes can shut them down, too," Logan said.

Another nod from Xavier. "Despite their propensity for eating humans, the Kanamits have very orderly minds. Seeing the impossible like that..."

"They shut down. Yes, I get it," Michael said abruptly. He was still a bit shocked. "With power like that, couldn't the boy win the war single-handedly?"

"Unfortunately, his power only lasts for a brief period of time. After that, he requires long periods of rest."

"And there are a lot of Kanamits," Logan said. "Thus, our need for an army. Beyond just the Zoners."

Michael made a face. "Zoners?"

"That's what we call the people with powers."

"You mean the meteor rock people."

"I prefer the term 'mutants.'" As he quietly explained, Xavier rested his hands in his lap. "The name 'Zoners' comes from a term used by airline pilots when they can no longer see the horizon."

"'The twilight zone,'" Logan said.

"Somehow it seems to fit our powerful new friends."

Pausing for a moment, Michael held a hand to his chin. "Some of these powers, they seem like magic."

Logan gave a slight shrug. "You mix meteor rocks with aliens, or a boy, it looks like magic."

"It's really science at a very advanced level," Xavier said.

"But is it enough?" Michael asked. "Against all of the Kanamits?"

As he stood at his podium with an open book, Henry held up a finger as he spoke, though he did not look at his audience.

"Don't be afraid of the Kanamits, dear friends. The Kanamits are not fighters. They employ secrecy and deceit. That means they've never had to put down a rebellion." He put both fists up. "Even without powers, we can beat 'em! We got 'em on the ropes!" Gritting his teeth, he threw punches at the air. "Fight those Kanamits! Fight 'em!"

"Good pep talk, Henry," Logan said.

Michael noted again the odd smile of Mr. Bemis. In response, he offered his own smile. "Our Mister Bemis does seem quite good at motivational speeches."

A grinning Xavier rolled in between Michael and Henry. "Now, Mister Chambers, with your permission I can show you a series of mental images that will help you understand our situation even more."

"If that's the case, why not do it all at once, get it out of the way?"

"We don't want to fry your brain," Logan said.

"How very considerate, Mister Logan."

"Just the kind of guy I am, Mikey."

Xavier smiled. "Youe mind can only handle so much, especially considering your recent ordeal with the Kanamits."

"It was a long space flight in comfortable quarters. What ordeal?"

"Right. You weren't at all stressed," Logan said.

More smiling from Xavier. "This is why we need you. Your sense of humor and your unique way of looking at things. You would be a great asset to our army."

"Very kind of you to think of me." He put away the new unlit cigarette. "You want inside my brain again? Have at it, Professor. In fact, visit whenever you like."

"I shall keep that in mind." As Xavier put a finger to the side of his head, Michael felt his head tilt back and he squeezed his eyes shut. A moment later, he opened his eyes. It was like he had awakened from a long deep sleep.

"I see you've raided a number of processing plants," he said in a groggy voice as he blinked his eyes. "You've also freed people from the Kanamit ships when they arrive. So tell me: the other people who were on that ship with me. Where are they?"

"They're fine," Logan said.

Anger rose within Michael. "Here we have aliens processing people for food, entire facilites devoted to that purpose. And you say they're fine?"

"It's all right, Michael, calm yourself." Was it Xavier's voice that soothed him or more mind manipulation? "Logan's broadcast filled them all with fear."

Michael glared. "And that's a good thing, is it?"

"Yes, indeed." Xavier continued to rest his hands in his lap as he spoke calmly and quietly, almost hypnotically. "You see, when the Kanamits eat someone, they take on the qualities of that person." He grinned. "Not unlike a certain mutant we once knew named 'Rogue.'"

"Took on my traits for a while," Logan said, starting a new cigar.

"My condolences to her."

Logan ignored Michael's remark. "Here's the thing about Kanamits: they are what they eat. If they eat someone who's full of fear, they become full of fear."

"Of course, if they were to eat someone with powers, they'd absorb that person's powers," Xavier said.

"Let's keep people with powers away from them, shall we?" Michael said.

"We are in agreement," Xavier said with a smile. "And I think you understand why I chose to talk to you about this rather than show you disturbing mental images."

"I do," Michael said.

Logan puffed on his new cigar. "Luckily, I'm too tough a meal for them."

Once again, Henry sported his manic smile. Then he spoke.

"The Kanamits are cowards! They use trickery!"

"They don't want anyone to be afraid," Logan said. "We can use that."

"Yes," Michael said absently. "They don't want their food to be afraid. That would explain their propensity for subterfuge."

"You know a lot of big words, pal."

"I was a decoding specialist." Michael sounded sad as he emphasized the word "was.".

"Maybe you and the Professor could play Scrabble."

"Maybe," Michael said with a grin. "You know, gentlemen, in our situation we're up against a lot. We should use people with powers. We need to use every unfair advantage we have."

Logan gave him a look. "Unfair advantage? In war, you use whatever you've got. To get the job done. To finish the war and go back to normal." He extinguished the last of his cigar. "You have a lot to learn about warfare, bub."

"I'm willing to learn."

He did. Over the next year, through a series of raids on processing plants, Michael learned about warfare. But according to Logan, it was unusual warfare. At least in the beginning.

First, in each initial raid, they started off by broadcasting a message to the plant. That had the unfortunate effect of announcing their presence to the enemy. But it was necessary to frighten all the people who weren't unconscious on the conveyor belts. Once the people were afraid, they were inedible.

With the element of surprise gone, Michael and the Zoners had to put up a furious fight as they herded the people away from the plant before they blew it up.

It wasn't really a battle. More like what Logan called a "special operation:" a quick military action with a limited objective. In this case, the objective was to get all the people out.

But then Henry had an idea: why not have Professor Xavier send out frightening mental images to the people, along with images of a route to the nearest exit? This could even be done to wake up the unconscious people. This retained the element of surprise while denying the Kanamits their dinner. Plus they rescued a maximum number of people.

It wasn't surprising Charles hadn't thought of this earlier, Michael realized. What with abruptly arriving on a strange new world and getting caught up in a revolution.

With more time to think and reflect, Henry was the one who planned ways for people to maximize their powers.

Each individual, with his unique abilities, was a big help against the enemy.

Unfortunately, the Kanamits became a lot more prepared for the raids on their plants.

Michael snapped back into the present.

They had encountered a large Kanamit patrol between the Solaris Cliffs and the Kro'le Wilderness.

Four Zoners known as The Masks sent out multiple images of frighening gargoyle faces. A woman named Lois shot fire out of one hand and ice out of another. The Kanamits shrieked and collapsed.

"Good work," Michael said. But if the patrol had gotten word to the main processing plant, a large contingent would be waiting, prepared to fight. And with powers of their own.

"I'm a mannequin on vacation," one soldier said.

"Return to base," Logan ordered. They had people who could guide any delusional soldiers back to base. Logan gestured to one of them.

Inwardly, Michael sighed. As the group marched, Michael thought back to another time.

Following a raid on one of the larger procesing plants, Michael and Logan returned to base.

"Clawing a bunch of giant robots may be easier than this," Logan said as the two carefully walked down rickety stairs.

"Is that a common occurrence on your world?"

"You'd be surprised."

"At least giant robots don't try to eat you for dinner."

"There's that. But we also had one team member who tried to destroy the universe. You ever known anyone who tried to do that?"

"Luckily, my coworker Patty had other hobbies."

"Glad to hear it."

Michael thought for a moment. "You know, Logan, at first the Kanamits didn't put up much resistance. They were easy to surprise and take out. Now they're fighting a lot more."

"That's how it is in war. You make a plan, and it gets lost in all the chaos."

"And when the plan gets lost? Then what?"

"Then, Mikey, you improvise." Logan started to light a cigar, stopped when he heard a commotion down the hall. Some kind of shrieking laughter. "And sometimes you have to fight the war in your own barracks."

Swiftly, the hairy man moved. With Michael trailing behind, Logan approached what looked like four members of a motorcycle gang, each one dressed like Marlon Brando in "The Wild Ones."

A red book was floating in the air, and Henry simply looked down at the ground.

"Come on, bookworm! Get the book, bookworm!" Despite his large bulk, the freckled redhead had a voice like Curly from the Three Stooges. .

"All right, guys, knock it off." Logan sounded both casual and threatening.

The book dropped. Henry did not move.

"Oh, come on, Logan. We're just having a little fun with the Bookworm."

With his unlit cigar, Logan stabbed the air. "For what we're doing, we need all kinds of people. We each have a vital part to play. And we need to be fighting the Kanamits, not each other. Anyone who doesn't understand that answers to me. Are we clear?" Briefly, his dark eyes short back and forth. "Good. Now go out on patrol."

They walked away, each one scowling. But they walked away without a word.

"Who were those fine gentlemen?" Michael asked.

"A bunch of jerks." Logan's language was not delicate.

Having retrieved his book Henry kept his head bowed as he explained.

"They are the last survivors of a race of people with fantastic mental powers. And, as you say, jerks."

"We call them the Riders," Logan said. "That thing with the book is just a small sample of what they can do. They have powers on a level with Billy."

"Although their own minds can't be manipulated," Henry said, holding up a finger.

With his cigar, Logan gestured to the reading man. "Don't let them get you down, Henry. You're doing great work."

Henry lifted his hand, smiled, returned to his book.

Michael also smiled. Mr. Logan might be lacking in the social graces. But deep down, he was a pussycat. Though not one you might actually want to pet.

Such a sentiment should not be said out loud, of course. But Michael did say something else out loud.

"Logan, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

"We're not going to hug."

"I should hope not." Michael quickly changed the subject. "Now about these Riders. They seem rather obnoxious. Why fight alongside them?"

"In war, you can't always pick allies of the highest character."

"Or intelligence, it would seem."

"You have to fight with whoever will fight with you."

"We've got 'em on the ropes!" Henry shouted, waving a fist.

Holding a new cigarette, Michael was more subdued. "That's the spirit, my reading friend."

Michael went ahead in his mind to when the Betty Grable nurse, actual name Janet, entered the room.

"The Riders went outside the camouflage area," she said.

"Of course they did," Logan said with a sigh.

"The Kanamits have them," Janet said.

Michael made the grim pronouncement. "Which means now some of the Kanamits have mental powers. As well as resistance to mental manipulation."

So it was that soldiers insisted they were men from Vulcan or Kanamits in a cave or mannequins on vacation in a store. There was only so much that Charles could do to mentally shield them all.

"Hello, boys," someone said.

Michael was back in the present again.

Agent K of the Men In Black held up a large gleaming silver rifle. With him were other members of the MIB, both human and alien. The MIB, as Michael had learned, was a secret organization that monitored alien activity on Earth. When the Kanamits arrived, the Men In Black immediately put a rebel organization in place. Just in case.

Here in the wilderness, each black-suited agent held a silver weapon alongside their armed alien compatriots. Or "out-of-town visitors," as K called them.

Michael gave Agent K a casual salute then he turned to the horizon. There were Kanamits all along it.

Michael remembered reading how Elvis Presley liked to keep busy before a concert so he would not get nervous. In the same way, Michael wanted to occupy his mind so he would not be afraid.

Once again, Michael thought back.

The bare light bulb room. Actually known as the War Room. Henry liked to joke there should be no fighting in the War Room.

Instead, on this day, there was jovial conversation. And was that a chuckle from the great Professor Xavier? Well, they were sipping brandy in the War Room.

"When we first arrived on your Earth, we encountered members of the Men In Black. They believed us to be aliens. Which, I suppose, in a sense we were."

"They were quite the welcoming party." Was that a grin from Logan as he chugged brandy?

Xavier rested his hands on the blanket in his lap. "The M-I-B had their suspicions about the Kanamits from the start."

"Just no real evidence," Logan said. "Until your friend Patty exposed them."

"Good old Patty," Michael said. "She used to bring peppermints to work so we sometimes called her Peppermint Patty." It was possible he was a little drunk.

"Be that as it may," Xavier said. "Once Patty exposed their true intentions, the Men In Black accelerated their guerrilla rebellion."

"With actual gorillas." Logan referred to an alien race known as the Grodds.

Xavier grinned. "The Men In Black were able to solve certain problems for us. I can show you if you like."

"Please do." It wasn't just the brandy talking. Michael found the professor's mental "visits" left him feeling refreshed, and his mind seemed somehow sharper and stronger.

Plus, a mental visit might be more fun while he was intoxicated.

As Xavier closed his eyes, Michael saw more of the situation.

As Logan had pointed out, a war needs a supply line. For the Zoners, that was a challenge. Their supply line had to stretch all the way back to Earth.

Luckily, the Men In Black flew ships back and forth. And they brought recruits from Earth, which included some aliens. Not just the Venusian and the Martian and others Michael had heard of. But also members of another alien race known as the Tricksters. (Their actual name was a series of high-pitched notes.) The Tricksters liked to visit a Kanamit city, turn lights and engines on and off, and watch as the Kanamits turned against each other.

This made Michael wonder if the Kanamits were really all that bright. They had always struck him as rather childlike. Perhaps eating Earth people had made them like Earth people.

Besides the alien help, the Men In Black brought technology or what they called devices from their "out-of-town" friends. Simulators created food and clothing for the growing army while another device cloaked their underground base, even causing Kanamit patrols to turn back. A device from someone called the Great Attractor caused temporary power loss at the processing plants, facilitating easier rescue of the people inside. In addition, the MIB had access to a wide variety of weapons.

The MIB brought something else: flying saucers to take people back to Earth. Though Earth had to be fairly empty at this point, some would rather apply their efforts to rebuilding Earth than be in the middle of a war. Both types of people were needed: the warriors and the builders.

As he stood in the middle of a great battle, Michael felt the builders had the right idea. All around him, soldiers were screaming.

"Don't you see it?" one shouted. "There's a creature on the wing of the plane! You must believe me!"

"I have gold! Just give me water," one soldier panted.

Kanamits screamed and fell as Billy sent out mental projections. One involved a general leading his unusual small army: a hobo, a clown and a ballerina. Next to them an army of giant talking dolls advanced.

"My name is Talking Tina. And I really don't like Kanamits!"

But there were so many Kanamits. So many. For all those who fell, a new wave poured in. Luckily, it was the leader of the Riders who possessed the srronger powers. The other three Kanamits who had the Riders' powers would be easily taken out by Billy and the Zoners.

Michael alternately fired his weapon and shouted frantic orders.

Time to improvise.

One man improvising stood near the Masks.

Logan called him the Crazy Man.

With a look both wild-eyed and cross-eyed, the Crazy Man looked like a bulky Abraham Lincoln with his bushy beard and dark open suit coat with hooks. His cackling laugh carried across the battlefield like a sonic boom.

"The aliens!" he shouted. "We'll fix those aliens! Fix 'em good! And then we'll eat 'em!"

The cackling laugh grew louder. Both the laughter and the shrieking voice emitted powerful sound waves that caused the screaming twitching Kanamits to clutch their bulbous heads just before they collapsed.

Most fell face down. A small bit of amusement on the battlefield.

But not much time to laugh. More Kanamits poured in.

As Michael stepped back, he nearly collided with Three-Eyes. Barely noticing, the soda jerk hurled his scoops of ice cream.

"You like to eat so much?" he growled. "Have some of this!"

As ice cream exploded on their bald bulbous heads, the Kanamits screamed. Michael thought the screams sounded like bats in pain. Amidst those screams, Kanamits fell to their knees then plopped face down.

Next to Three-Eyes, Three-Arms threw his cigarette butts and cards. More Kanamits went down but others convereged on the cluster of Zoners that ringed Michael. It was all Michael could do to get out of the way, firing his ray gun behind him.

When he glanced to his left, he saw Henry holding a silver Men In Black weapon. More like a cannon than a rifle, it was a wonder Henry could lift it at all. But with one of their meteor rock cocktails, Xavier and Janet had given Henry temporary strength and invulnerability.

Once Janet and her staff had quickened the process for turning meteor rock into serum, they were able to give temporary powers to a lot more people. The soldiers. Former prisoners. Medical staff. Even those who worked in the office.

All were needed.

But Michael wondered if it was enough. Though dwindling in number to some degree, the Kanamits still stretched all the way to the horizon. It was like they had amassed every last Kanamit to protest their last processing plant.

Henry fired off three quick bursts. Amazingly, most of the Kanamits on the horizon went down. So did those near Michael.

Resting the weapon on one shoulder, Henry smiled.

"It's nice to take a break from reading," he said.

It wasn't just Henry, of course. It was all of them taking the Kanamits down.

Henry raised a fist to the air. "We got 'em on the ropes!"

Michael had no chance to respond. And there was no need to. Henry had fainted.

All around Michael, soldiers screamed and collapsed.

"This machine tells me the future! I can't leave!" one soldier shouted.

"I let the Devil escape! Twice!" another soldier groaned. "Oh, why did I leave the cleaning woman to watch his cell?"

One by one, the Zoners fell, and Michael listened to the horrible loud crashing thuds all combined. Until all the Zoners were lying on the ground twitching and screaming. Michael could only imagine the nightmares they were having.

He looked at the lone Kanamit standing against the now empty horizon. Glancing to his left, Michael saw Billy lying down on the ground..

As the Kanamit drew closer, Michael recognized the smell. It was like skunk mixed with moth balls. Somehow on Earth, the Kanamits had masked their foul stench along with their foul intentions.

Once he heard the distinct deep mocking voice, Michael knew.

Kanamit Prime.

"Well, Mister Chambers, it appears I shall be eating you after all."

Michael did his best to look nervous. "You don't want to eat me. Think of all the fear I must have."

Prime laughed, a deep hearty laugh laced with menace. "You? Fear? After all the raids you've led? I think not." Smiling, he reached out his hand. "Once I absorb you, I shall have your courage, your indomitable spirit. As I move on to other worlds, I shall be invincible."

Slowly, Michael backed away but then he found himself unable to move. Mental control by Kanamit Prime, no doubt.

He tried another tactic. "Hasn't anyone ever told you overconfidence can be your undoing?"

"No. Nor do I believe it." Kanamit Prime smiled. A horrible smile. "I could have taken you out along with your comrades. But I prefer to toy with you. Even though Mother told me I should never play with my food." A more gruesome smile followed.

"Hard to think of a Kanamit having a mother." Swallowing nervously, Michael sent the thought out. Got to get him away from Billy.

With his new smile, the Kanamit showed all his teeth. "Ah. The boy. Excellent suggestion, Mister Chambers. I shall absorb the boy and his powers, and even an army of many worlds could not stop me." As he spread his arms wide, he staggered a little. "As witness this!"

Once he stood over Billy, Prime reached out his hand just as the boy opened his eyes.

From inside Michael's mind, Xavier said, "Now, Michael."

Michael unleashed his own new mental powers, quietly honed during the recent raids. Together, he, Billy and Charles filled the Kanamit's mind with nightmare upon nightmare.

In his mind, Prime was a giant to tiny people in a flying saucer labeled "U.S. Air Force." Then he suddenly grew to a great height so he was a giant to tiny people in a tiny city. Standing next to him was a giant statue of himself. Then he was staring up at a giant Michael and giant Billy.

All while being besieged by an army of giant talking dolls.

"Ha!" Michael said. "How do you like that? Your own tricks used against you."

"Ugh," Prime said.

"Concentrate, Michael," Xavier urged quietly.

Already, Prime was on his knees. Now, the Phoenix descended on him. Black and glowing and filled with stars, it enveloped the Kanamit's mind.

Kanamit Prime screamed in agony. Billy was on his feet as were Logan and the Masks.

The last thing Michael saw was Three-Eyes and Three-Arms sitting up.

Michael wasn't sure if he went unconscious or not. He knew he felt refreshed so Charles must have used one of his mental "visits."

As he looked around, he saw the situation was reversed. All the Kanamits were down, the Zoners were on their feet.

Oddly, Michael laughed. Actually, not so odd when you considered that Kanamit Prime looked like something out of a comic strip. His butt was high in the air while his chin was down on the ground. In place of his smile was a dazed stunned look.

"It worked, Charles," Michael said joviallly.

A portal opened up, and Xavier emerged. Short-range teleportation, courtesy of an "out-of-town-visitor" device.

"I was able to shield your deeper thoughts from the one you call 'Kanamit-Prime.' He was unaware of your temporary new mental powers."

"Or the secret plan," Henry said, dusting himself off.

"Good work with the faking, Billy," Logan said. The boy just smiled and nodded his head as, remarkably, Logan tousled his hair.

"I didn't think it would work," Michael said. "You told me the leader of the Riders was able to resist mental manipulation, the kind you and Billy engage in."

"Quite so. But when the three of us combined our powers, it was simply too much for him. Especially since I've used my powers for a much longer time."

"Still, hard to believe he could be fooled like that," Michael said, shaking his head.

Posing like a statue with one leg bent, Logan prepared to light a cigar. "Guess being an arrogant S-O-B makes you stupid."

"That was a factor working in our favor," Michael conceded.

"Good work, Charlie."

"Logan, I have asked you not to call me that."

Logan took a quick puff. "Come on, guys. We won the Big Battle. Time to cut loose." With his thumb, he gestured to Agent K." "Look at the K-Man over here. He's ready to party."

"I've fought worse." With his usual grim look, K stood with his silver cannon lowered as he surveyed the scene. "Now that the human-eaters are out like a light, what do we do with them all?"

"Can't let them run loose all over space, that's for sure," Michael said.

Looking more wild-eyed than usual, the Crazy Man hooted enthusiastically. "We could eat 'em!"

"Too tough and stringy," Michael said with a grin. "Or so I imagine."

Crazy Man was undeterred. "Eat 'em! Put sauce on 'em and eat 'em!"

"Give it a rest, will you, pal?" As he puffed on his cigar, Logan looked mildly annoyed. But Michael knew if the Crazy Man was in trouble, Logan would be the first to help.

Henry put down his weapon. "It will be nice to go back to normal."

"Yes, indeed," Xavier said with his own grin. "We can stop the meteor rock treatments."

"Billy will be a normal boy again," Logan said.

"Good," Billy said. "Not sure what I might do with too much power."

"The other Zoners can also go back to normal," Michael said.

"I'll have time to read," Henry sighed.

That was when a gray portal opened. Various weapons clicked, powered up, went up. But the two figures who stepped out were not Kanamit. Nor did they appear all that dangerous. One looked human, a youth with a boyish face and neat brown hair. The other looked alien with a face somewhat like a horse.

Xavier waved his hand at the Zoners. "It's all right. I've read their minds. There is no danger."

The boyish one spoke in an exuberant tone. "Hello, everyone!"

"Hello," the Zoners said as one, all mumbling uncertainly.

"I'm Wesley Crusher, and this is the Traveler." He turned to Xavier. "We're the ones who sent you here."

Rolling forward in his wheelchair, Xavier smiled. "I suspected it was not an accident."

The one called the Traveler offered his own smile. "You were correct, Professor. You were sent to this universe at this time to help with this situation."

"We're all grateful that is the case." Behind Xavier, murmurs of appreciation went up from the Zoners.

"Speaking as the Kanamits' next dinner, I am personally very grateful," Michael said, offering a mock bow.

Wesley stepped forward to shake hands with Xavier. "Now we're taking you back to your time, your world."

"To your destiny," the Traveler said as he also shook hands.

Logan turned to Michael. "Hate to fight and run. But it looks like we gotta go."

"Watch those claws," Michael said as the two shook hands.

"See ya, Mikey."

As Logan stepped aside, Xavier rolled towards Michael.

"Well, Michael, I am afraid you shall have to decide on your own what to do in the aftermath of war."

"I shall miss your wisdom and guidance, Professor." Michael clasped the man's extended hand with both of his hands. "But rebuilding after a war is better than actually being in a war."

"We are in agreement, Michael."

"I second that," Logan said. He wheeled Xavier into the portal where the two became shadows next to Wesley and the Traveler. The portal closed with a quiet "whoosh."

Michael looked around, first at his dear new friends then at the fallen Kanamits.

"We'll turn the base into a makeshift prison, just like we planned," he said. A smile crept over his face. "We'll use their own ships to take us home."

As a cheer went up from the Zoners, Michael had a brief uncomfortable thought.

What if all this was just another mental illusion by Kanamit Prime, just something taking place in his mind while he was being prepared for dinner?

He quickly dismissed the thought. If it was just an illusion, why not enjoy it?


End file.
